Monthly Archives: February 2011

body update


In the merry-go-round of diagnostics, I have yet another answer about PCOS and yet another doctor for my girlie bits.

I missed another period when I missed the progesterone and it left me feeling hopeless for a minute thinking my body was totally fucked. I found a new doctor and restored my faith.

I won’t rehash the doctor stories. You all know me and know the history of horrible experiences. After the miscarriage (back in the Chet days) I went back to my old practice and I started out with a tiny little grey-haired women who is maybe 120 pounds soaking wet that I called Dr. Munchkin. The first visit with her was a massive relief from the hell I went through with Dr. Icy. But then Dr. Munchkin kinda tuned out, tried to blame everything on my weight despite test results, and changed my diagnosis 3 times in 3 visits. When I complained to her about how awful I felt on metformin and how I wasn’t losing weight, she simply told me to change to 1200 calorie diet. Umm… fuck you.

Suffice to say I was miserable, felt like I had a doctor that didn’t care, and yet all I want from this is a baby! I cracked one day under the pressure and cried to Dean about Dr. Munchkin and Dr. Awesome. You know that man went out of his way to hunt down Dr. Awesome? He looked online and then called office after office. He never found her, but his effort alone inspired me to call my practice back and ask for a new doctor. I was transferred to the office manager. Apparently they take complaints seriously and I should have done this years ago with the cervix ninja. The office manager recommended a different doctor and I had my first appointment with her last week.

And Dean went with me.

I went with the intention of getting off of metformin but ended up in a fertility consult with an actual plan of action! I’m calling her Dr. Real because of how she was with me – REAL! She listened, read my chart, and said “you have SOME symptoms of PCOS, but not enough for me to say its definite so lets work around it right now” and I decided right then and there I don’t care if I have it or not. We’ll make this work. Having Dean there showed her that I have a supportive partner and it didn’t seem to matter that we’re not married. She was realistic about my weight, gave me a goal (10% of my weight) and asked me what I was doing currently. Dr. Real also approved of my current course (5-6 smaller meals a day, focus on whole foods not calories, and try to “eat the rainbow” every day) because it’s working. I’ve lost 6 pounds!

She also told Dean outright she wouldn’t put me through anything else until he got tested. His results would determine the next course of action which is either another med or another clinic. (Let’s hope for clean healthy sperm and going on that med, eh?) He was very involved and asked some questions. He finally heard everything I needed him to hear and now we’re on the exact same page.

Dr. Real is keeping me on the Metformin and progesterone with new instructions on how to take them and a week later, I have FINALLY stopped getting sick all the time. Woohoo!!!!! Now I’m motivated to keep taking them! So now the next step is an ultrasound for me to check out my uterus and make sure it’s still healthy and a sperm analysis for Dean. Results will determine the next step, but I have a good doctor again and a plan and that’s a great stepping off point. Oh, and I got a period finally so thats a positive sign!


adventures in merging


This whole merging lives and babymaking adventure has taught me a few things:

– While chiseling out the logistics of moving in together, you start to realize that not only do you have way too much shit for one apartment, you can’t seem to get rid of it fast enough.

– A 36 inch tube TV will take 3 days to get rid of on Craigslist. A beat up dresser, twin bed, and cheap Ikea side table will get you 33 replies in 2 hours.

– You stop buying things for “me” and start buying things for “us” and you stop thinking about “what if we are no longer an us?”

– Finding a couch you both agree on will be akin to searching for the Holy Grail when there’s almost a foot of height differential between the two of you, you want to hide stains but have a year-round shedding husky, and you’re buying something long term thats going to have to fit in a home thats short term.

– When you both have digestive issues and there is only one bathroom, there is no longer a closed door policy. In fact, there will be MANY conversations that occur with one of you on the toilet.

– When he goes with you to a doctors appointment, your entire view will change because suddenly you know 100% that he’s really going to be there every step of the way.

– Reading message boards on any of the baby websites is guaranteed to simultaneously make you feel like a member of MENSA and weep for the future.

– Despite the basic biology of sperm + egg = baby, there’s a LOT more to it than that and it’s shocking how tiny your chances actually are every month. This makes it all the more astounding how many people get pregnant having only fucked once.

– If at first you don’t like your doctor, switch and find another one. At some point you plan on this person being up inside your vagina helping to extract a tiny human out so you better like her/him.

– Conversations about sex, porn, and masturbation become every day topics.

– To keep the sex life fun, you will do anything you can including, but not limited to: finally utilizing the lingerie drawer, greeting each other at the door naked, the filthiest dirty talk you can imagine, drawing on each other’s bodies, wearing pigtails in public, and putting clothing (yes, there was even a small football helmet) on the penis. That last one led to so much laughing that we couldn’t see straight.

– If you’re pushing 30 and 35 and you’re childless, never been married, and you live apart, outsiders will think you’re insane for trying to have a kid. Your friends and family on the other hand will completely understand it and support you. Especially when you both have very ethnic parents and very pushy siblings antsy for nieces/nephews.

– Post-coital you’ll look at each other and realize that this is really it and you’re really making this happen. At some point you’ll realize that love really is all you need.